1. |
Borderlines
05:10
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Time fading away: peeling back the minutes every day
Time fading away: borderlines are blurring into gray
Time fading away: we observe a specimen today
Shouting at the void, staring at the walls
Petrie dish in abject disarray
Storm is on the way, storm is on the way
A Crimson tide that can not be allayed
Pride stripped away/ flesh for debts that can not be repaid
Pride stripped away/ the origin of codependent rage
Storm is on the way, storm is on the way
Manifest another sad display
Haven’t seen the sun, haven’t seen a soul
Here I am, but I will not remain
I am the pain, body and mind
I am control gone in time
I am the pain body and mind
I am control gone over time
I am the years yet to pass
Never the first never the last
Hand over hand, draw the lines
Hand over hand, draw the lines
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2. |
Stop The Madness
04:30
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Can’t you tell when it is your happy and when all is well?
You’re driving yourself crazy with granular personas talking endlessly with nothing new to say
When all alone the noise amongst the silence feels like all you’ve known.
Your heart starts beating faster, reflecting on the life that you could live if you could throw your life away
Maybe seems well; however, underneath the surface is a prison cell containing all the damage you create
There aren’t any problems to be seen, and yet you fabricate bespoken confrontation out of nowhere
Resenting things that don’t make sense and lashing out in impotence is just another way to tell the world your cause is lost
You think about it every day and still, you’ve nothing left to say for lack of real attempt to stop the madness
Did you ever try to stop the madness?
Did you ever try to stop the madness?
The feeling of unrest brought on by idleness is put upon yourself and here you stand, just waiting for the crash
The prison cell is open, and the shadows start to slither out, but did you ever try to stop the madness?
The echos of your anger clash with failures yet to come and past transgressions, the occasions when you didn’t measure up
You’re every fight you ever fought and all the squandered time you bought, and never once you thought you’d stop the problems in your head
Never once you thought you’d stop the madness
Grit your teeth, dig in, and stop the madness
Just as well, I wager you’d still feel as though you lived in hell in any situation
Make your peace and get your coat you know you’re only standing in your way
Only in your way
Only in your way
Only in your way
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3. |
Charades
04:50
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These were the games you’d play
Got you through the day
You saw no other way
With a life out on display
Days were long and days were boring
Days are gone away
Days you used to scheme, ophelia, how you’d get away
When things were getting too performative
You would’ve had your day, but you fell astray
You got in your own way when you tired of the charades
Such ambition, such conviction, such a crooked line
Such a lofty dream, ophelia.
Do you realize that you’re the only thing that’s stopping you?
You were anxious, you were angry, it was so absurd
Makes you want to scream, ophelia, that you lost your nerve
But we still do the things we gotta do, right?
A pain you settle into to forgive
Such a bloody boring way to try to try to live
So easy to tune out all the static when you pull the plug, but we’re here to dial in
You’ve got a lot to say, let’s put it on a tray
Without the disarray, you could move on with your day
You can move on with your day and take your life off of display
What’s one small thing you can do to make your world a nicer place?
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4. |
Pass
04:54
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This is a battle that you have won
This is a battle that you have won
This is a battle that you have won
This is the damage you have done
This is a battle that you have won
This is a battle that you have won
This is a battle that you have won
This is the person you’ve become
You’re coming to appreciation for the way you feel inside, so come to an appreciation for the way you feel inside, because it’s just the way you feel right now and it’ll pass
It’s just the way you feel right now and it’ll pass
Yeep, yeep, yeep
This is a lesson that you have learned
This is a lesson that you have learned
This is a lesson that you have learned
This is a bridge that you have burned
This is a lesson that you have learned
This is a lesson that you have learned
This is a lesson that you have learned
This is a corner you have turned because it’s just the way you feel right now and it’ll pass
It’s just the way you feel right now and it’ll pass
It’s just the way you feel right now and it’ll pass
It’s just the way you feel right now and It’ll pass
Chronic illness, chronic anger, chronic shame, and chronic doubt
Lack of self-control is turning you into a burning house
Friends and loved ones keep their distance, rightly so until such time it is you come to an appreciation for the way you feel inside, come to an appreciation for the way you feel inside
Come to an appreciation for the way you feel inside
Come to an appreciation for the way you feel inside, because it’s just the way you feel right now and it’ll pass
It’s just the way you feel right now and it’ll pass
It’s just the way you feel right now and it’ll pass
It’s just the way you feel right now so let it pass
Let it pass, let it pass, let it pass
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5. |
Dear Anxious
03:09
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At your hand you command the power should you ever choose
to reframe all your pain as a better kind of truth
get a clue, a tattoo, a lesson learned and there’s the proof
self aware, now you care, on the hook so follow through
put your pride to the side and you might find the fortitude
to defy prying eyes no surprise they’re trained on you
understand how to stand, leo sun and virgo moon
set the mood, name the tune, lead the way they’ll follow you
don’t deny the what you have found
build the kingdom tall upon the blood and sound
come around to the sound it’s calling homeward bound
come around, come around, midfall before you hit the ground
come to learn come to learn come to learn with eyes anew
come around to astound spread your wings and drop the ‘tude
It goes further than you know
Share your world dear anxious share and watch it grow
Lead the way, they’ll follow
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6. |
Bleed
03:54
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It’s easy being cynical, you see
It’s easy to be angry and resentful considering the lives we have to lead
Needles in the piggy bank and a burden on society
That’s me!
My disease won’t let me be
Bringing out the worst of me
My disease won’t let me be
When all I ever do is bleed
I really wanna give up on that fight
Considering the option every day and every night
I know that nothing I could ever say could ever take away the pain
I’m coming to appreciate the origin of codependent rage
Give me an H!
My disease won’t let me be
Bringing out the worst of me
My disease won’t let me be
When all I ever do is bleed
When all I ever seem to do is bleed
He-Mo Let’s go!
My disease won’t let me be
Bringing out the worst of me
My disease won’t let me be
When all I ever do is bleed
When all I ever seem to do is bleed
Give me an H!
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7. |
Redefine
05:37
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On the face songs are empty words
Bordering on the absurd half the time
Let’s redefine
The kind of vernacular we might use
Alter the lexicon ‘til we break through and in spite of ourselves we can try
Through bearing the heart and the mind
And through vulnerability we may find purpose in fighting the good fight
Emotion is fluid
Existence shifting its tide
Never a dragon to be slain
This is a process, processing pain takes time
To redefine the meaning of life beside the audience
It should be obvious that you exist
When you persist drawing in breath after breath
Now it’s time
Breathe deliberately now clear your mind
Of relentless creation birthed from ideations of welcoming demise
Watching and waiting to see the unmaking
In time, to quiet the mind’s machinations
Continue attempting the progress
May you arrive
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Max Feinstein Hoboken, New Jersey
Max Feinstein is a Musician and Bleeding Disorders Advocate from New Jersey.
With each song you will find a post detailing a little history on the writing and recording as well as further sentiments of intention and whimsy,
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